So this is going to be very rambling and probably somewhat disjointed. I haven't written in months, unless you count all the posts I've started in my head. (And believe me, I've had some doozies. I have been spending a lot of time thinking and re-evaluating so many things in my life. A lot of what I have been thinking had to do with figuring out what I do and do NOT have control of in my life and how I should act - or react, accordingly.)
So my oldest baby, Morgan, leaves in less than a week for the MTC and then off to the Philippines. Oh, the emotions...... One thing I am so very grateful for is the fact that she has wanted to go on a mission since she was a little girl, so I know it was not a rash decision or one fueled by peer pressure from all the enthusiasm brought on by the recent age change for missionaries.
People have started asking me how I am feeling, which I honestly think is a very brave question. Anyone who knows me even somewhat well is probably prepared for a less than upbeat answer. (I had already scheduled my nervous breakdown for Thursday, all day, but then I remembered there is that blasted Orchestra meeting for parents that apparently is not optional. I'm still a little annoyed at the music teacher that told my son that he seemed like he would be a good cello player, so Austin took her literally and HAS to play the cello. Never mind the fact that the cello can NOT go on the bus, so I will now end up doing something I have previously avoided at all costs - driving to the school at regular drop off and/or pick up times. Sigh. (I think that is one of the few times I have actually typed out the word "sigh". That seems a little dramatic, even for me.) :-)
So, my pity party for one is now grudgingly postponed until Friday. I have been saving a Lifetime movie just for the occasion and plan to make kettle corn and my famous "healthy"(ish) Coconut Oil Fudge. (And eat it all myself. Mmmmm, I need to post the recipe.) Hmm, I better throw something healthy in there too.
(Oh SHOOT! I just remembered I DO need to go somewhere Friday. Can't a girl wallow in sorrow for a full day anymore? I just looked at the calendar and I have at least one thing every. single. day. the next week too! Nooooooooo. This may turn out to be an ACTUAL nervous breakdown. I have been waiting all summer to be ALONE for a day.)
And in other news: I just took the Myers Briggs personality test, per Morgan's request. She is an INTJ and thought I might be the same. I had heard that term before and it did seem to fit. So I did take the test and I turned out to be an ISTJ. It said I was really close to an INTJ, but I had a small margin, less than 1%, of sensing over intuition.
My first response was "Really? I'm that close, but still can't be one of the "cool kids"? But then really, I don't necessarily trust my intuition so it was a pretty interesting result. One of our favorite things it said when Morgan read the explanation of my personality type is that I have an off beat sense of humor, I'm introverted but can be the life of the party at family and work gatherings. (Which of course, I CAN be, I just choose not to. Ha ha ha. Anyway.....)